Dating as a spiritual soul is hard enough as it is trying to protect your energy, but I think that a lot of things that women and men overlook are the basics of spiritual dating.
It's important to recognize that the Divine is going to send someone into your life who can teach you lessons and elevate you in some ways but energetically they're going to be aligned with you on some level, so if you are unhealed in anyway expect the person that you are seeing could also possibly be unhealed in those exact same way. It's meant to highlight the ways in which you need to heal as well.
People are far too quick to allow way too much to happen within their relationships simply because they want the divine union, they want that divine love and they're willing to settle for anything to believe that that's what they have. Most people don't know divine union or divine love, they know sacrifice they know putting their life on hold for people who don't want to progress in their healing journey. By having to put everything on pause they think of it as a self-serving sacrifice, and they think that they'll elevate.
However, it's the delusion they feed themselves to retain the relationship. Most people want to believe that if they do this sort of self-sacrifice, they'll get to the next stage in their relationship they'll get to the next title they'll get that engagement that marriage whatever… It is that they're striving for, not realizing that the compromising never truly ends if it starts at the beginning of the relationship and the energy doesn't properly align. You're having to do all this then it's going to continue throughout the entirety of the relationship. Not only does this leave space for you to continue to attract narcissists and manipulators it leaves space for you to completely pause your own healing journey, why? Because you will continue to sacrifice and compromise yourself for someone who you believe you're supposed to be with, for someone who you believe is your twin flame, for someone who you believe is your soulmate and that's absolutely not the case!
We tend to forget that our energy is our first currency and how we choose to spend it is solely up to us. If we choose to invest it In people who aren't going to want to continue on their healing journey; for people who are going to manipulate us for people who are going to continuously have us compromise on things that we know our soul would not want. We MUST HONESTLY ask ourselves why? If we can't come up with an answer for why we don't need to be in a relationship with anyone other than ourselves right now. We need to go back to the drawing board, we need to sit with ourselves, we need to heal ourselves and then we need to figure out what dating with a purpose looks like for us…
What do we actually want in a partner, the partner we seek is also seeking us. That Divine healthy union that is going to help us elevate that is going to help us grow in the most beautiful ways, we cannot have until we are out of that space of self-sacrifice of compromise. That space of willing to accept anything and everything that comes our way especially for the sake of the title like a soulmate or twin flame.
Remember when thinking about dating with a purpose you have to ask yourself if is this someone I would be willing to procreate with. Then when you think about that you have to remember the child that you bring into this world is going to be your greatest art. If children is not something that you desire then you must ask yourself the following question: “Am I willing to compromise in the ways that I'm compromising now for the rest of my life?”
If I am not willing to deal with the consequences down the line, things like separation or divorce or things of that nature sometimes it's just better to understand things now fully on a spiritual level to avoid those deep cuts farther down the line.
This is also especially true if you are someone who is newly single but has already spent time cultivating family life meaning you already have children whether you are male or female masculine feminine whatever you subscribe to is this someone you would allow near your children?
People take relationships far too casually especially when it comes to the seriousness of energetic exchange and how much time we are spending on or with someone. It's not a time to be lenient or casual about things. You’ll wake up one day and realize you wasted so much of your time, your energy, your first currency, on something that didn't align with you and made absolutely no sense. It's just so unfortunate when it could have been avoided. This lesson goes for masculine and feminine alike while we both have that duality within us no matter what you subscribe to whether you are male or female non-binary, it doesn't matter what you subscribe too, everything should be well thought out and intentional.
You are an extraordinary being having a human experience wasting your time on anyone and anything that does not align with you energetically that will halt your progression is not worth it in the end it just is absolutely not.
Another person's inability to heal should not hinder our own journey, especially when it comes to love. It would be foolish to believe that the divine has only one soulmate lined up for each of us. The universe has multiple soulmates aligned with our energy who are meant to assist in our healing and elevation.
As the current and or future elders of our communities who have learned valuable lessons in love through pain, we have a responsibility to help others understand that it's okay for multiple truths to coexist simultaneously. We can prioritize our own well-being while still approaching relationships (entering or exiting) with compassion. There is a level of self-respect needed when dating with a purpose. When this is the case many may think you have an unchecked ego, when the truth is you have good spiritual hygiene and standards you will not compromise on.
So, you got into a transformative relationship but now there is no growth, and it's become unhealthy now what? Exiting the relationship when it's halting your growth process is not always wise depending on your personal situation ( again making space for all truths and realities to exist I’m aware someone simply can’t pick up and go all the time ) IE: abuse victims who may need to strategically plan to leave the situation.
While some of us may choose to go our own way with love and understanding, others may perceive themselves as being in a higher position. It's disheartening when some individuals respond with cruelty, dismissing the other party and expressing harsh sentiments. It is important to create space for all truths, allowing individuals to navigate their own journeys in their own time. You can leave the relationship without lowering yourself or acting out of character. Stand within your principles, but do so with grace and compassion. You can also exit the relationship without allowing for the other person's unhealed traumas to keep you trapped in a situation that no longer serves you or puts you in danger spiritually or physically.
Walking away from a situation doesn't require rudeness or an air of superiority. It's crucial to remember that we all had to go through similar cycles of growth and learning. Reflecting on our own pasts, we can acknowledge that we too needed grace, compassion, and the freedom to grow. While we acknowledge our old roots myself included, we understand that we can't hold anyone's hand through their own journey, whether they are soulmates or not. It's a process that everyone must go through, just as we did.
As we step into the role of the next generation of elders, we are realizing the importance of acknowledging multiple perspectives. While we can't fully deny anyone's viewpoint, the truth remains that if someone is unwilling to try and put in the necessary work, they should be left where they are. It's important to understand that this approach has been successful for those who genuinely want to grow and heal. Both sides benefit from this commitment, resulting in personal growth and a transformed dynamic when and if they come back together. It's evident in the ways they show up for one another each day. There is almost this burning desire to get to know this person all over again because it's as though you're meeting for the first time. You are absolutely not the same people you were when you left and started your separation, you're better you're stronger you're more resilient your energy does not sit in the same spot that it was.
However, if someone, even a soulmate (as friends and family can be soulmates too), remains unhealed, and unwilling to put in the necessary work it's crucial to let them go. Pausing our own journey or impeding our progress for someone who is not willing to grow is counterproductive.
Instead, we must understand that source is going to do its job and put our next soulmate who is aligned with this energetically directly on our path so that we may engage in that relationship instead as our life does not need to be on pause because someone else does not want to progress in their healing journey.
It's essential to avoid getting too caught up in titles anyway, as this can hinder personal growth for some individuals. If a connection holds a divine purpose and a higher meaning, someone may communicate this to help us understand how the cycle is supposed to play out in the lessons we may need to learn from this. The term "soulmate" should not automatically imply blind acceptance of anything and everything. This is often where people make the mistake, they believe that because someone is their soulmate or their twin flame that they have to hold on with their very last breath and that is simply not the case. As Erykah Badu once said, "I guess I'll see you next lifetime." Not to mention the fact that most people this day and age cannot differentiate between a soulmate, a twin flame, a false flame, and a karmic relationship.
These are not all the same and twin flames are extremely rare, not everyone has one as not everyone's Soul needs to be split into more than one body to complete a mission. When one cannot even begin to comprehend these relationships, I find it is best that you stay away from trying to label them as such. Unless someone who is connected to the spirit realm on that level can tell you exactly what it is what it means and how you can navigate these things.
In conclusion, one of the greatest things you can do for yourself besides dating with a purpose is going back to yourself becoming one with source consciousness in waking life. You must then understand that you do not need to subscribe to all sorts of labels and energetic agreements that make no sense to you or that weren’t promised to you ( in your Akashic records. ) I understand that we all crave companionship, we all want someone who understands us. We all want to be loved and a safe space and then an environment that allows us to thrive but a lot of us aren’t getting that because not only are we not dating with intention, meaning dating, knowing exactly what it is that we are looking for and standing up for the values. Also ensuring we do not compromise immediately in the beginning, but we have no clue who we are spiritually until we begin the path back to the self. Therefore, how do we know exactly what it is that we desire in romance when we are in the beginning / middle stages of those death & rebirth cycles? The cycles where those harsh lessons come deeply into play so we can release and we feel the most lonely as we are called back into hermit mode.
Divine Love isn’t about being lonely — the name of the game is being okay with you and where you are in your journey before anyone else can allowed add to your life on this level.
Come back to you first, it’s the most important relationship you will ever have anything else is a blessing and should be adding to you.
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